


Shield of down

by RedheadShenanigans



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftercare, Alternate Universe, Angel Castiel (Supernatural), Angels, Angels Inc, BDSM, Bottom Dean, Bottom Dean Winchester, Dark, Demons, Dom/sub, Dominance, Eventual Smut, Fast Moving, Fluff, Funny, Love, Lust at First Sight, M/M, Sassy Sam Winchester, Smut, Soul Bond, Soulmates, Succubi & Incubi, Succubi & Incubi are both male and female, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, WIP, Werewolves, Witches, everything except hugh jackman, half breed Dean, incubi are dom's, succubi are sub's, there will be smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-02
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2019-08-16 17:06:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16499354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedheadShenanigans/pseuds/RedheadShenanigans
Summary: After a long day healing and helping the world, Cas is exhausted. He and his BFF Meg are chilling in their regular haunt 'Darkness Rises', an Demon/Angel bar.All is well until a male half-breed falls broken and bloody into his lap. Those green pain-filled eyes suck him in. Emotions he's never experienced swirl and pound through his Inccubi body like a sandstorm. The world is half dominant incubi and half submissive succubi but this one, this one he can't figure out. Cas can count on two fingers how many times a sub-species has baffled him since the dawn of time and that alone hits Meg's weird shit-o-Meter. It's not like he hasn't touched a succubus before, both male and female kinds but this is different.When a rasp of sound escapes from the mess in his arms, a simple plea, "Please, don’t let them find me. I can’t go back there.”Cas does the only thing he can, he vows to help. Hopefully, he won't end up ass deep in alligators.





	1. CAS: Angel killing bullets

Cas sat in the bar sipping a coke. Water, his preferred choice annoyed the demon owner, he had to buy something once in a while. Slow music pulsed quietly in the background. People came here to do business and being able to hear each other helped. Curved booths with high, thick surrounds crowded three of the four walls. They were ceiling high for privacy and there were side rooms if you required them.

Today had started like any other. Leave the bar at six, stroll to work through the park and arrive at the hospital for seven. He'd said hi to the staff, a mix of witches and humans then followed the doctors around all day healing who he could. They adored him and it felt like undoing some of the pain he family inflicted on the world. The Bar, convenient because it opened 24 hours a day, gave him a way to avoid Heaven. Something about that place drained him. Yes, it was home but he preferred earth, he always had. 

The work was rewarding but left him drained. After twelve hours of healing gunshots and terminal illnesses exhaustion always loomed. It had become his life and his brothers and sisters didn’t get it at all. They thought it wasted time and potential, that he should be helping them run Angels Inc. Yeah, the name wasn’t very inventive at all but hey they were angels not marketing executives. Even their marketing execs had no imagination. 

Cas wanted nothing to do with the money-making machine his brethren had created. For lack of a better word, they were evil. They didn’t think so of course but Cas knew what went on behind those closed doors. Nope, he wasn’t going to participate in it. They had healing powers for a reason and he would use his power for good for as long as he could. Angels avoided him in the bar like a pariah, they did not want to be associated with him at all. Demons too, no one wanted contact with an angel who shunned heaven and their interests. Well everyone but his closest friend.

“Hi, Cas.” A blue-haired demon slid into the seat next to him and smiled. 

“Hey Meg, you’re early.” He replied glancing at the clock.

“Yeah, got tonight off from the corporate machine so I thought I’d come say hi to my favourite feathered friend.”

Cas smiled, “I’m always here, it's not as if I’m difficult to find.”

“Yep, you need a place Cas. I know Duke doesn't mind you being here but don’t you want roots? It’s not like you spend any of the money the hospital gives you and I know you donate everything Angels Inc send you. We've been friends a long time bird boy... maybe it's time for a change? You could get a place, something nice.”

“I don’t want their money.” He said sipping his coke, “You know they feel obligated to send it, Anna makes them.”

Meg sighed, “Right, the ex-friend you won't talk about. Anna the big boss.”

“Can we talk about something else please?” 

“Sure…" She grinned, "Anyone cute in here tonight?”

Cas smiled, “Charlie you mean?”

“No.” Meg huffed, “Maybe?”

“Just ask her out.” 

Meg ordered her usual beer, “Cas, I’ve told you, witches don’t date demons. They have a thing, you know, bloodlines and whatever.”

“You’re not just a demon Meg, you’re one of the best, most powerful lawyers in the country, she'd admire that.” 

Meg took a swallow of her drink and glared, “And she’s a high-level witch. And she's the most skilled criminal defence lawyer I’ve ever met in my life. She hangs out in a demon bar for god's sake.”

“So you have no issue with her letting murders run free but you are intimidated buy how good she is at it?” Cas shook his head, “I will never understand demons.”

“Nope fluffy, you never will.”

Cas frowned, “My feathers are not fluffy.”

Rolling her eyes Meg ordered a shot of whiskey, “You know what I mean Cas.”

Swallowing the last of his coke he stood, “I’m going for a walk.”

“It’s raining.” 

“You know that doesn’t matter to me.”

“I will never understand you Cas.”

He threw a tip on the bar as usual, “I like being a mystery.”

Meg’s laugh followed him across the room. The door flew open before him and a human, no, not human. A half breed and it passed out, nearly falling to the hard ground. Cas caught the bloody broken thing as it slid to the floor. The succubus genes touched Cas' Incubus and his body lit up, emotional fire consumed him.

The world sat divided by the Incubi/Succubi. The Incubi, like Cas, were more dominant. Sometimes in all things, sometimes only in the bedroom. The traits didn’t always manifest strictly and could vary. One fact was always the same when it came to sex, Incubi were doms. Succubi, like the half breed in his arms, were usually passive. They were happy in secondary rather than leading roles. Again it wasn’t absolute and it varied but one rule held when it came to sex Succubi were subs, always. 

Cas ran his fingers over the man’s face, smearing the blood on his hands. The human vessel reacted almost violently. Lust swam through him, boiling his blood. Cas touched people all day and he’d ever experienced anything quite like this. 

‘Not many half breeds though,’ his internal voice whispered. 

No, very few. People tended to date and breed their own kind so they were rare.

Meg interrupted his thoughts, “Cas… is he…?”

“Dead?” Cas asked, “No.”

Instinct kicked in as Cas tried to use his gift. Pain wracked through his body and he screamed.

“Cas!” Meg yelled, “Stop.”

When he could catch his breath he frowned, “What was that?”

“I don’t know but don't do it again.”

Shaking his head he added, “Okay Meg. I, I think I healed his human side but I think he’s part something else and that… it feels broken, damaged but I can’t touch it.”

“You’re telling me, Cas almighty angel, you don’t know what he is?”

“Yes, it’s unusual.” He scowled. 

“Wow, gotta be a first.”

“Second actually.”

Meg stared at him, “You can’t be serious? In several millennia you’ve been stumped twice?”

“I don’t see what severed trees have to do with this Meg.”

She knelt by him and the crowd grew larger, curiosity getting the better of people.

"Morbid fuckers." Meg growled.“You should get him to the hospital. Maybe Call the cops?”

Cas looked at her. Suddenly a bloody hand wrapped around his beige trench coat lapel. Glancing down, huge green eyes peered up at him. Beautiful, the half-breed under all that blood captivated him for a moment. 

“No… no hospital’s…” he heaved with a voice like sandpaper, “Home… take me… home…”

Tilting his head Cas replied, “Home?”

“Safe… house…” He forced out the words, finding some strength from somewhere, “Please, don’t let them find me. I can’t go back there.”

Cas heart throbbed and it shocked him, emotions. Serious emotions sizzled through his chest. Not the shallow, dull buzz he dealt with day to day. These were the kinds of emotions that the other races discussed but he’d never felt. Well, until now. The man passed out and Cas started to panic. That was new. 

“Well, wasn't that weird.” Meg spat, “What are you going to do?”

Cas glanced at her, “Take him home.”

“Cas… you can’t get involved with this.” She hissed, “Whatever it is, it’s bad. You don’t know what he is… what you’re getting into.”

“I have to Meg, I can’t explain it… I feel like I know him.”

“Even more reason to leave him to die in a gutter.” She cursed. 

Cas glanced at his concerned friend, “You know I can’t do that.” 

“Damn it, how will you even find his house? Or the safe house or whatever.”

Closing his eyes Cas focused on the man’s mind. Disjointed images flashed but one became more prominent than the others. A door, it was a solid metal door, he focused on the details. A flash, something similar to a warehouse or maybe an electrical building? The location felt far away, across the country, Kansas? A sign appeared and confirmed it, yes Lebanon. 

“I have it. If I don’t contact you hit on Charlie and get her to scry for me. You still have my feather right?”

“Cas! No.” She hissed, “You're my best friend!”

Smiling he gathered the broken man in his arms and stood, “I’m your only friend.”

“True but still, all the more reason to not get your ass in this mess.”

“It’ll be okay Meg, I have a… feeling.” 

The demon growled and stood with clenched fists, “You have a feeling!? You never have feelings! You’re like a cold, perfect statute Cas. You’re seriously harming my calm right now.”

Her blue hair became dishevelled as she took her frustration out on it. The tight black designer jeans emphasised her thin frame. Rage and worry shook her tiny body. Grabbing the edge of her grey Coda t-shirt she glanced at the man in his arms like she would an enemy or food. 

“Meg, I’m going okay? I swear I will call you.”

Genuine concern flickered in her eyes before she shrugged. 

“Whatever douchebag, just don’t get yourself ass deep in alligators. I don’t want to have to save you. I have a rep you know, can’t go around saving people, especially angels.”

“Yes, Meg.” Cas smiled, “I will avoid reptiles at all costs.”

Another eye roll punctuated the rapidly approaching sirens. Glaring, she waved her hand flippantly, “Go, I’ll keep the devil from your door.”

“Thank you, my friend.”

“Shoo.” She hissed and as he blinked out. 

Meg had been his friend for three hundred years, his only friend as he hers. They enjoyed each other's company, the simple back and forth suited them both. She didn’t ask anything from him. Well, that was inaccurate, she always asked but not from anything he was unwilling to give.

During the early development of the U.S, they’d hung out in a bar further north of D.C central. Now they spent all their time at 'Darkness Rises'. Meg said it was a subtle name for a demon and angel hang out, Cas assumed she was being sarcastic. 

Landing hurt as he hadn’t recovered fully from yesterday's healing sessions. The man groaned as Cas stumbled to a stop. Glancing around at middle of nowhere USA he saw the large building. Was that a bunker? Cas moved forward, it looked overgrown and unused. Logically he knew a safe house shouldn’t have an arrow pointing at it but sighs of life would have made him feel better.  
Maybe he should just knock? Warding covered the grey walls. Someone was prepared and expected a little of everything, even angels, so blinking in wasn't an option. The man’s life sights were stable but Cas felt an urgency like being hunted. As a soldier, he had learnt a long time ago to trust that instinct. So making a decision he strode over to the metal door. The foliage had become overgrown but not around the door, finally, a sign of its use. 

The rapping of his knuckles on the metal echoed loudly into the darkness. 

“What do you want?” An angry male voice called from the dark. 

“This person is hurt, he asked me to bring him here,” Cas replied. 

“Who is he?”

Cas shrugged and realised that they probably couldn’t see him in the dark.

“I don’t know, he asked to go to the safe house. I pulled the information from his head.”

The voice hissed, “You went into his mind?”

“Yes, there was no other way. It was difficult, I only received the location of this place because I think that’s what he wanted me to see.”

“What are you?”

“An angel.”

“…right…” 

Cas became agitated, he felt exposed.

“He was being chased, can you please send someone out here to check if he is a friend or not, please.” When in doubt, be polite, twice.

“Fine, put him down and we’ll send someone out.” He added.

Sighing, Cas placed his unconscious charge on the cool ground and stepped away. The urge to pick him back up became overwhelming but he resisted. It took a minute but eventually, the door opened and a tall dishevelled man stepped out. The large gun aimed in his general direction. It probably couldn't stop him if he wanted to cause any real harm but he understood their need to feel secure.

“Angel killing bullets.” He growled as he bent down.

“I don’t mean you any harm.”

The man’s eyes glowed slightly and for the second time in an hour, confusion buzzed in Cas' mind. 

“Dean?” the man whispered, “Oh god… Ruby! It’s Dean!” 

A lithe brunette ran from the door and they lifted him awkwardly into the bunker. The heavy door slammed behind them. 

Cas shuffled on the spot and whispered, “I’ll just wait here then.” To the empty air.


	2. Dean: When you wake up dead

Sounds, voices… Sammy.

Dean slammed upright in his bed. Tears welled in his eyes, oh Jesus he was in his bed, he was home. Well, the bunker.

“Sam!” he yelled and moments later footsteps pounded down the corridor.

The door flew open and his brother hurled himself across the room and into his arms.

“Agh.” He groaned as his insides objected to the force.

Sam recoiled, “Sorry! Oh shit, sorry Dean. Are you okay?”

Dean smiled, “Yeah Sammy, I’m okay, just a little sore.”

“Cool, okay, cool.”

Dean watched his brother fidget. The tall young man was dishevelled, very unlike Sam. The beard took him from the appearance of twenty-five to closer to thirty.

“Sammy, please go shave… you know how I feel about face fur.”

The laugh caught him off guard, “It’s not my fault you think beards are hot.”

“… you look like a sasquatch…”

“You have a serious fetish dude.”

Dean scowled, “Sam!”

“I missed you, big bro, I’ll go in a second. There's just something you have to deal with if you're up for it?”

That piqued Dean’s interest, “What?”

“There is an Angel pacing on our porch.”

Frowning, Dean stood and followed Sam out into the bunker proper. Ruby sat watching the security screens.

“Dean!” she flew at him and wrapped him in a hug. Fake coughing hard she stepped back and composed herself. The nod was tight as she spoke, “Welcome back.”

Glancing at the screen’s Dean had a flash of memory, healing, flying… home.

“It saved me?” Dean whispered and Sam nodded.

“Rummaged through your brain for the location and then brought you home. That was three days ago and it won't leave.”

“Castiel,” Dean whispered.

“What?”

“His name is Castiel.”

“His?” Ruby interjected, “These animals took you and experimented on you, Dean. It doesn't deserve human pronouns; it’s the same as the others, a monster. They obviously have an end game we don’t know about; why else would it stay out there?”

Dean scowled; something in him rebelled at Ruby's words. Fear rose so he pushed it all away.

“Also, Why would you give it our location anyway?” Sam added, “You've compromised the facility and now we’ll have to leave.”

“No,” Dean said as his fingers ran across the screen. It was an absent-minded gesture that had Sam’s eyebrows hitting the roof.

“He won't hurt us… they hate him.”

“He’s an angel, they’re all the same.” Ruby frowned.

“Not this one.” Dean said, “He’s… kind.”

They both looked at him like he’d lost his damn mind.

Realization dawned and he glared at them both, “How many angels have a best friend who’s a demon? Huh? I don’t remember much but I remember the smell of sulphur from his friend.”

“Not possible Dean… Angels hate demons. The only reason they hang in the same bars is to avoid the humans and witch's who they hate more.”

“I know that Sam but I’m telling you, she’s his friend.” Dean made an executive decision and walked to the small safe they had in the corner.

“Dean, what are you-? Don’t you dare!” Sam growled.

Looking over at his little brother he frowned, “Don’t throw orders my way, Sammy. Have you forgotten who leads the resistance? I know what I’m doing.”

"You've lost your damn mind!"

The safe opened and Dean grabbed a necklace, they each wore similar kinds. Taking it, he secured the safe and then jogged to the door.

“Dean!” Sam yelled.

Dean ignored him and opened the main door to the bunker. The air was cool on his skin and he could feel how damaged he still was inside. The Angel, Castiel, turned as he exited the bunker and smiled. Warmth hit Dean like a train and recognition, it was as if he'd known Cas a really long time.

“Hey.” Dean walked towards him, closer than he should have. Closer than any normal human would have in any normal situation.

Cas, yeah Cas… he liked that, tilted his head. Fuck that was cute. Right said the part of him that had been hunted his whole life, let just stop that right here.

The Angel was hot and an Incubus… high up on the scale, he could feel it, exactly Dean’s type. Oh, that sucked because god only knew it would take hell freezing over for his people to be okay with him and an Angel. Was he really considering that as a possibility? Shit, no. Slamming that door closed tight he focused on the enemy, yes the enemy. ‘…but it’s Cas’ a small voice whispered and he batted it aside.

“Hello.”

“Dean, my name is Dean.”

“Hello, Dean,” Cas added and a shudder took him over.

Dean stepped forward and handed him the necklace, “Here, come inside, we need to talk.”

Cas frowned, “This will get me inside the warding?”

Nodding, Dean walked back towards the door.

“You trust me?”

“Shouldn’t I?”

Cas frowned, “I don’t know. I suppose it depends why you were broken and bloody in my arms a few days ago.”

It was the ‘in his arm’s’ part that did it. Dean had the urge to close the space between them. It was so strong he had to physically stop himself. It was hard… yes, even that.

“My brother is already throwing a bitch fit and I’m freezing so can we debate this inside?” Dean replied.

“The bearded man is your brother?”

Dean nodded, “Yeah, come on.”

Cas followed him down into the main room.

“Sam, Rube’s, this is Castiel, he saved my ass.”

They stood unmoving as the Angel took a seat around the map table.

"You're human," Cas said to Sam.

"Partially," Sam replied.

"...and you're a Demon."

"What of it?" Ruby hissed

Dean huffed, “Guys, seriously, chill.”

“It’s an angel, Dean… I don’t know where your heads at but I think you’re broken.”

“He may be correct,” Cas added.

They all stared at him with wide eyes and Cas elaborated, “I can sense something in you that I wasn’t able to fix.”

Dean grinned, “Oh they really have kept you out of the loop, haven’t they? How long have you been earthbound?”

Frowning, Cas glanced at him, “A millennium… more.”

Sam and Ruby softened slightly then and took their seats at the end of the table.

“Well, I’ll tell you what you missed. Your kin has been hunting us for a long ass time.”

Cas stilled, “Hunting you? Why would they hunt you?”

“Because Mr 'In the dark', they want hybrids for their demon war.”

The angel stood and paced the room, “Explain.”

Dean sighed, “Several generations ago we started forming Hybrid packs. Formed of half breeds that worked and lived together. The angels figured out that we made great toys for their experiments. They all but wiped us out hunting us down.”

“For what purpose?” Cas sat again.

“Loyal and obedient soldiers.” Ruby added, “They were trying to find a way to erase the weaknesses.”

Cas sat again, “How?”

“Sammy?” Dean asked.

Sam took a switchblade out of his pocket and handed it to Dean. The cut was shallow but enough to demonstrate what he needed to. Seeing it was easier than explaining.

“That’s… no… it’s an abomination they wouldn’t.”

Cas’ tone was one of pure horror as he recoiled in his seat. Dean’s eyes filled with compassion, it was both weird and annoying.

"That's why I can't fix it."

“They are and have been for a very long time.” Dean said.

Sam sighed with exhaustion, “Grace, their grace. Somehow it sticks, makes us stronger. The only problem is that it doesn't seem to stick permanently. Eventually, it burns us out, everyone who has escaped has died.”

“I see.”

"You see?" Sam laughed, "He sees Dean. Fucking angels."

"Sam... stop," Dean said flatly and his brother glared at him.

Dean could see the conflict it caused in Cas and something twitched in his chest. Not a good something, like a pain but not. He pushed it to one side not willing to examine it too closely.

“So why did you save my brother?” Sam asked Cas.

The Angel considered the question and then answered, “I don’t know. I just felt like I had to.”

Dean smiled at him and Sam slammed his hand on the table.

“Dean! Seriously, stop eye fucking him okay. It’s disturbing as all hell.”

“Fuck you, Sam, I’m being nice.”

Sam stood, “He’s an angel, they’re unfeeling monsters, it doesn’t need you to be nice. It doesn’t feel anything.”

“Sam, stop it.”

“Dean,” Ruby interjected, “You were looking at him all soft, it was weird.”

“Was not.”

Cas coughed, Angels didn’t need to cough so it was to get their attention.

“Yes, Cas?” Dean asked as he glared at his brother.

“I have feelings.” He replied, “I’m not like the others, I was made… differently. I have feelings.”

Dean felt his lip twitch as he turned to the Angel and Sam lost his shit.

“Dean!” he cursed, “Holy fucking Jesus what is wrong with you? I know you were in there for three years but Christ-”

“Three years?” Dean hissed, “I was in that hell hole for three years?”

Sam stopped mid-rant and stared, “Yeah… can’t you… don’t you remember?”

That's why he looks older, it's not the beard. I lost three years in there. Pain surged through him, shit, he'd lost a lot of time.

“How long did you think it’d been?”

Dean sat back in the chair, “A few months, tops.”

“Shit dude, I’m sorry,” Sam whispered, the anger lost for the moment.

Cas spoke up, “They took your memories…”

“Fuck.” Dean hissed, “Did they let me escape?”

“Most likely.” Cas nodded.

“Why?”

Considering it the Angel frowned, “So they could follow you here?”

“Cas, can they follow me here?”

Watching Cas, he shook his head, “If you had arrived by any other means its possible. I brought you here and they wouldn’t have been expecting that.”

The sigh of relief was audible.

“Okay, so we go back to base and regroup?” Sam asked.

Dean frowned at the internal struggle in his chest. There was no way he could take an Angel to the base, none but the thought of leaving Castiel was strangely painful.

“Maybe I’ll stay?” Dean said but wasn’t sure it was a good idea even as the words left his mouth.

“Why would you do that?” Sam asked, “Mom is worried sick, she’ll be pissed, Dean.”

He grimaced at the thought of his mother's wrath but it would have to wait, he needed to figure out what was happening. Not just with the Angels but with his Angel. This connection was strange, maybe they could use it. They’d been hunting his people for a long time but if Dean was alive then maybe some of the others were? If they were they had to save them.

“Maybe some of the others are alive Sammy? Did you think about that? If I survived, maybe they did too?”

Ruby and Sam stared at him.

“No Dean, I didn’t because you’re the only one to ever come back and stay alive!” Sam hissed, “Maybe I don’t want to risk my family? Maybe I want to go and see my boyfriend? Maybe I’m tired of running the resistance and I maybe wanna go hide in Canada forever!”

They glared at each other, Dean startled when Cas touched his shoulder. They warm fuzzies surged and made him happy in all his happy places. It was like drugs, like warm, safe, familiar drugs.

“You could stay. I don’t have a home so I could stay and check into it with you. I have been avoiding my brethren for far too long. It’s time I took a stand. I could at least help you gain more information?” Cas offered.

Sam glanced at them both and then stood, shaking with rage, “You can't be serious?"

Dean glanced at Cas and then Sam. The shrug was not the answer his brother wanted.

"Fine. I’ll tell Mom you’re alive but not for long because they brainwashed you and now you've decided on a suicide mission. I’m going home.”

“Sam… come on don’t be like that.”

Ruby picked up her pack. They’d been ready to leave, figured.

“You know where home is Dean if you change your mind.”

They both ignored the Angel, took to the stairs and then out into the midday sun.

Dean sagged onto the table with a sigh as the door slammed closed.

“Fuck.” He hissed.

Cas touched his shoulder again and shivers flooded his body. Dean glanced up at the angel, a smile flit over his lips. His gaze moved to the blue tie hanging around Cas' neck. Pull it, a voice whispered, pull him closer.

“Dean?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re staring at me.”

“You’re hot,” Dean replied as his frustration and annoyance ebbed away.

“I’m at a moderate but efficient temperature.” Cas tilted his head with a wry smile.

A sarcastic angel, who knew? It had his cock throbbing in his pants. A warning voice sounded but Dean pushed it away. He’d nearly died, he knew it, hell he still could, so fuck reason, fuck caution, just fuck.

Dean took the tie between his fingers and rubbed it. Cas watched him like it was the most fascinating thing in the world. Succubae were the ones who usually initiated sex, so Dean was working inside what was expected of him. Cas watched and waited for more and Dean knew he would. It was a ritual between the two halves. Dean was dominant in life but this is where it changed. In this, he was happy to embrace offering himself to whomever he liked. Once past this moment, he was all sub.

“Dean.” Cas’ voice cracked. Dean looked up into those big blue eyes.

“Yeah?”

“Be sure okay? I don’t do this often and once I start I won't stop, it’s been a long time.”

Dean shuddered at the thought. Being manhandled by this gorgeous hunk of celestial perfection? Oh yeah, he was in.

Clearly, the Angels had damaged more than his body. Before they’d taken him, the thought of fucking an Angel would have made him want to blow chunks. Now it seemed like all the good ideas, just all of them.

Dean pulled on the tie and Cas moved with it. Their lips were almost touching when Dean whispered, “Fuck me, do your worst.”

The growl was not something he expected, nor was being hauled from his seat by his shirt. Cas was strong, like ridiculous strong and it had Dean's breath catching. Holy fuck this was going to be awesome. They stood on the hard floor of the map room and Cas kissed him. Not rough and hard like he was expecting but a brief, tender touch of lips. Fire poured down his throat into his cock.

“I’m going to take you. It will be how I like so pick your safe words.”

Shuddering with his eyes closed Dean whispered, “Apple pie.”

“Just one?” Cas asked, making sure he didn’t want something more gradual.

“Just one, do your worst.”

Cas grinned and Dean melted, “Oh I think I’ll work up to that.”

Dean sighed as Cas’ lips met his once more. It was another brief and tender graze of soft flesh, then it was on.

Cas ran his hand up into Dean’s hair and tugged. Dean braced for the pain. The injuries had been throbbing since he'd woken but whatever had been wrong before seemed to be gone. The only discomfort was from the pull in his hair and that was a delicious kind of pain.

“You like pain?”

Dean grinned, “Yes.”

“Good.”

The Angel spun him around and bent his sweaty form over the table. There was no warning as Cas pulled his pants down to his ankles then tore the t-shirt top to bottom. In an instant, he was as near naked as he could be while still wearing clothes.

“Holy shit.” He hissed.

“You haven’t seen anything yet.” Cas murmured.

Two fingers slid down Dean’s spine and found his ass, the puckered bud begged to be used. He’d never wanted to be fucked so badly in his life. As his dick throbbed against the solid metal of the table a pathetic whimper slipped out. Cas’ thick fingers rubbed his hole and he cursed, lube, they had no lube. A digit slid in with no resistance. Both the pressure and the sudden slick feeling surprised Dean which took his breath away.

“How?” He gasped.

“Just a little something I can do.” Cas grinned as he bent over and licked the sensitive skin behind Deans ear.

“Holy fuck.”

This was going to be better than he’d imagined. After two quick fucks with a finger, Cas took out his cock and rubbed it against Dean’s ass. It was huge, both long and wide. The thought of being that full was amazing and terrifying. As the angel lined up his dick with the tight hole Dean became a little pensive. Surely he wasn’t going to… yep, he was. The bulbous head pushed against the tiny orifice and Dean moaned. There was no way he was safewording out. Cas pushed and the slick opening accepted the first inch of his head.

It was amazing and painful as the long unused opening struggled to adapt to the enormous intruder. Another inch in and Dean was gasping for breath past the pain.

“Apple-”

Before he’d even finished the pain was gone. Cas was still inside him but the pain was simply gone. Dean froze as pleasure pulsed through his body. Holy shit Cas’ cock was huge. It felt amazing now the pain had ebbed a little.

Cas started to move and the pain returned but now he knew what was coming Dean could relax. He sighed as inch after inch of Cas’ monster dick filled him.

Dean shuddered as Cas moaned his name, oh holy god this was amazing.

“Do you have a bed?” Cas asked breathlessly.

Dean nodded, thinking Cas would move but he just ran his fingers over Dean’s neck and then they were in his room. Cas had teleported or whatever them on to his bed with Dean landing on his knees.

“Well, that’s neat,” Dean whispered as his ass clenched around the solid piece of flesh tearing him up.

“Shut up Dean,” Cas replied as he forced another inch in.

It felt like his insides were being pushed aside in the best way and he happily stopped talking. Cas moved out a little and then back in, this time it was one smooth move and Dean cried his name. The pain shook him but pleasure overrode it as Cas bottomed out. He had no idea how big the Angel was but he’d never felt so full in his life. Oh god, it was good.

Cas’ hand gripped his neck and nails bit the skin.

“Oh god.” Dean moaned.

Cas lost his shit and hissed, “Be quiet Dean.”

The Angel was a high-level Incubus. Dean had expected it but not this high. Cas was top of the food chain dominant and by all that was holy everything, it was awesome. He instantly went into toy mode and nodded. That's what the high-level incubi wanted, a fuck toy. In the simplest terms, someone to do as they were told and Dean was at his happiest like that.

Cas trailed his other hand to Dean’s ass and shoved him to the bed with force. Realising he was actually naked now Dean smiled. Cas’ dick was buried inside him. The man's body was almost flush against his back and he couldn't have been more contented or full.

The right hand grazed up his thigh and then his waist and ribs. Then fingers moved to his shoulder, neck and brushed tenderly over his lips. Dean opened his mouth to suck Cas’ fingers. There were the same ones that had been buried in his ass earlier but the Angel had other plans. Cas pushed half of his hand into Dean's mouth, it literally stopped him from talking.

“If you want me to stop, throw the pillow from the bed okay?” Cas whispered into his ear.

Dean nodded and relaxed as Cas started to fuck him. The feel of cool skin on his sweaty body was perfect.

Cas’ fingers used his face as something to hold while he abused his body. It was categorically the best things he’d experienced in a long time. He felt safe, he shouldn't but he did, Cas wouldn’t hurt him.

The pounding was relentless. Cas’ other hand supported some of his weight on the bed as he thrust all that length into Dean’s tight abused hole. The slick feeling kept coming. It allowed him to enjoy it fully with a touch of pain from the force. The Angel was holding back, he knew it because Cas could have torn his ass in two. It showed how submissive he was that the idea of being physically decimated turned him on. Dean's hands gripped the comforter as the ferociousness and speed increased. Cas was close, Dean could feel it. Shudders forced up from his groin, he was going to cum without ever being touched directly. Shit, this guy was good.

“Oh God, Dean,” Cas hissed as he bucked his slick load deep into Dean’s ass.

Dean groaned around Cas’ fingers as he came and a second later. Pure ecstasy cascaded through him as his dick twitched and pulsed cum over the sheets. Cas lay on top of him shuddering.

The gorgeous Angel slid out of him slowly. Dean clenched at the empty feeling which was doubled as Cas pulled his fingers from his mouth. Dean's jaw hurt in a good way and he swallowed trying to get saliva in all the dry parts of his mouth.

Dean stayed on his front as Cas rolled from him to the side. The other man pulled at his hip and Dean rolled over, his back to Cas front. They were both naked. Dean realised Cas had also teleported himself out of his clothes, damn, he'd liked that tie.

What happened next was unexpected. Cas disappeared but returned in a second with a towel. He placed it to one side and then pulled the dry side of the sheet over Dean. Tears filled his eyes as Cas’ hand stroked his arm and then down his thigh and back up his ass. Long fingers slid up his crack and dipped into the cum leaking from his hole. The feel of Cas’ fingertips pushing into his gaping opening and playing with the cum was insanely hot. It caused a whimper to force it’s way past his lips.

Cas leaned in and kissed his neck as a finger slid all the way into his hole and then out. Dean gasped but relaxed into the tender care that was being shown. Kisses found that soft place behind his ear, then the lobe where Cas decided to bite a little. Dean’s cock stirred, fighting the fatigue but it was nice, it was horny but also simply Cas saying thank you. Dean had never experienced aftercare like this not even from people who claimed to love him. The tender man wiped his hand on a towel before returning to stroke Dean’s skin.

The Angel took several long minutes to caress every inch of Dean’s aching body then chase the touch with kisses. A contented sigh slipped from his lips as Cas mopped up the excess cum dripping down his ass and thighs. Once he was done the Angel pressed himself tightly against Dean’s back. To complete the perfection solid arms wrapped tightly around him. The sheet covered them chest to toe and Dean sighed, he was sated, warm, comfortable and safe.

After fifteen minutes of care and silence, Cas whispered, “Are you okay?”

A tear slid from Dean’s eye, thankfully the angel couldn’t see, “Yeah, that was amazing.”

“I wasn’t too much? Too hard on you?”

Dean rolled over. The trepidation in Cas’ tone hurt his heart, “It was amazing.”

Cas watched for a lie as Dean gazed up at him and smiled when none came. Dean stroked his fingers over the other man's face, relishing in being able to touch him.

“Castiel, that was perfect. Don’t ask me how or why but that was the most perfect experience of my life, you knew just how I wanted everything.”

Cas grinned and it was blinding, “I feel like I’ve known you forever… is that strange?”

Dean laughed, “Yes but I get it. I feel it too.”

They cuddled like that for a while longer until Dean fell asleep in his Angels arms.


	3. CAS: Feelings...

Humans could be so pleasant when they were sleeping but not Dean. No, he had horrible nightmares that were relentless. 

It was understandable of course, the half breed had been tortured by his kind. He had lost time and woke up tainted with grace, it was a trauma that would take time to process. Cas embraced him to stop them, as soon as his arms touched Dean he began to settle. There was a childlike softness to the human as he settled into Cas’ embrace. The emotion that filled Cas was more peaceful than being in heaven itself. Whenever Dean twitched, Cas had to stroke him back to peace and he vowed that he would kill them all. Castiel was one of Heavens fiercest soldiers and for the first time in a millennium, he felt it. Vengeance would be his. It was time to stop hiding from his brethren and their atrocities, it was time to face them. There was something about this human. Something that made Cas want to take him somewhere safe and never let him go. Watching Dean was like watching the sun, he knew he was beautiful but every pass of his eyes made his heartthrob. The creator had pulled out all the stops when creating Dean Winchester. 

‘Cas,’ the whisper was barely audible but he’d heard it. 

‘Cas’ 

This time he realised it was in his mind. Someone was calling out to him but they were having difficulty, probably all the warding. It was a risk to go outside but he had to see who it was. Leaving Dean, even temporarily felt like a trial by fire. It was as if part of himself was being left behind. Not once in his very long existence had he ever needed anyone. Like? Yeah, sure, but need? Not once. This was new and terrifying. Terror, another new emotion, what was happening to him? 

Tearing himself from the bed, he dressed quickly. Once done he tucked the blanket around Dean’s exhausted form but as Cas moved towards the door Dean stirred. 

“It’s okay, I’ll be right back,” Cas whispered, unsure of where the soft platitude had emerged. Something strange was definitely happening. He vanished from the room and landed at the main door, opening it slowly. Caution was his new best friend as he crept into the very early morning darkness. 

‘Cas!’ 

The voice echoed and instantly he knew who it was. 

“Meg?”

‘I’m in your head you douche,’ she snapped.

A smile crept over Cas’ lips, “You were concerned about me?”

‘No, it’s your turn to pay the bar tab and you know I’m not letting you outta that. I’ve been on a whisky bender and that shit ain’t cheap.’

“I’m fine Meg. Lie low, this is going to become… interesting and I don’t want you to get involved in the crossfire.”

‘You’re a damn moron if you think I’m leaving you to deal with this alone.’

“I don’t want to risk you-”

Her exasperation ricocheted around his mind like a tennis ball, ‘Not up to you feathers. I’ll see you in about thirty seconds.’

Cas’ eyes went wide, “What?”

“Hey, loser.” Meg’s now real voice called from behind him.

Cas let his head sag to his chest as she walked over and punched him hard in the arm. It hurt, it wasn’t supposed to hurt and his flinch made her eyes wide.

“I wanted you safe.” He whined and it was a shock to them both. 

Meg stared at him open-mouthed, “Did you just whine like a damn human infant?”

Cas’ gaze found his hand which suddenly became rather interesting as he replied, “No. I don’t whine.” 

Meg shook herself and changed the subject, they both ignored the flinching. Cas could tell this had been a weird day for them both and there were somethings best left to deal with later. 

“So, new digs?” she asked moving towards the door. 

“Yes, but you’ll need a talisman to enter.” He replied then moved quickly to the door. Returning a few moments later with one of the necklaces Dean had provided him, he handed it to Meg. 

The Demon took it tentatively as if it would bite and Cas laughed. It shocked them both and she stared at him as if he’d grown a third eye. Again, they ignored it because there was only so much they could deal with in one day. 

“Right, in we go then.” Whispering as she stepped through the doorway. She shuddered as her foot passed the threshold, “Well that was unpleasant.”

“Yes, it’s a unique experience.” He replied, a smile fought to take over his face but he worked hard at keeping it away. Meg was shaken, no one would be able to tell but Cas could and his suddenly spiralling emotions weren’t going to help. 

His friend had recovered her composure in the seconds it had taken to walk through the door. While demons didn’t tend to feel much of anything at all, Meg had always been a little different. Cas has deduced long ago that this was one of the reasons for their bond. They were both anomalies of their kind and it drew them to each other.

“Well, this is homey.” She commented as her foot touched the floor of the communications room. 

Cas smiled because apparently, his face was doing that now. 

” Yes, the residents don’t feel it necessary to personalise their safe houses.” 

Meg gazed around taking in the space with a curious mind, “Who?”

“The human resistance, well half-human.”

Confusion reigned, “Resistance?” 

“Sit?” He asked sliding into one of the padded chairs in the library. 

Meg followed and Cas retold the story from earlier. 

“Shit, so they’re trying to wipe out my kind once and for all? Cas, you know what this means right? If someone let your human out, whether by mistake or design, they’re coming for him eventually. If Crowley finds out what they’re up to the war will start now and not whenever they’re planning their move.” 

“I know. I’m… torn.” 

“Torn how?” Meg asked her expression confused and speculative. 

Cas sighed and the casual sound had the demon’s eyebrows rising. 

“I can’t explain it. I feel like I know this human. Dean.” He corrected the word because it felt wrong and impersonal to call him by his species. “I feel, more than I ever have Meg. The past three days waiting for him to wake was torture unlike any I've experienced. I can honestly say if he left, if I had to survive without him, I’d hunt him down simply to exist in his presence.”

“For the love of Lucifer, you fucked him!”

It was Cas’ turn to be surprised, “What?”

“It’s all over you ya dumb ass, that’s what that smell is! I’ve never smelt an angel post sex so I didn’t spot it but yeah I see it now!” 

If Cas could have blushed he would have but instead, he narrowed his eyes and snapped, “And?”

A huge grin split her face, “Well done feathers, he’s hot too.” 

With a roll of his eyes, Cas replied, “Demons.”

“Cas?” A tired voice called from behind him. 

Meg grinned again and silently mouthed ‘Cas huh?’ She knew as well as he did that something was very different about his relationship with this human. 

“Dean?” he replied as he stood and closed the gap. Without thinking about it he slipped himself around the man who embraced him back. It was like coming home, no reluctance, they were just whole when they were together. Cas startled at the thought, he’d never thought of himself as missing something before. 

“Is this your demon?” Dean asked as he glanced over Cas shoulder. 

“I’m his friend.” Meg snapped, not liking being referred to as property even though she’d just done the same thing to Dean. Cas noted the hypocrisy for later. 

Cas grinned and Meg’s mouth hung open, “This is Meg, yes, she’s my demon.”

Dean stepped to Cas’ side and slid his fingers into the Angels, “Do you know Ruby?”

“She vanished a few hundred years ago.” Meg replied, “but I know of her, yes.”

“She’s with us now,” Dean added as he rested his head on Cas’ shoulder. Cas could see that Meg was deciding if their affection was cute or if she was going to vomit. A smile flit across her lips, cute it was. 

“Well, that’s new. Demons and humans working together huh?”

Dean nodded, “Yeah, she came to us to help. Didn’t like that the angels were hunting us and was trying to avoid a war by keeping it from Crowley.” 

“Makes more sense how he hasn’t found out what they’re doing.” 

“Yeah, she’s worked her ass off so no tattling to Crowley, Demon.” Dean was only partly joking, somehow Cas knew that Dean would fight to the death to stop a war, to keep his family safe. 

“Why you little-” 

“He’s joking Meg,” Cas said cutting her off. 

Folding her arms tight she sighed, “So what’s the plan?”

Dean moved out from under Cas’ loving gaze, straightened and said, “Get stronger, get prepared and go back in.” 

“Sounds like a death wish. I’m in.” Meg replied with a wry smile. 

Cas watched them exchange a look. It was one he wouldn’t understand it for some time but that look was camaraderie. Something in Dean understood Meg in a way that the angel never would. Instead of annoying him it reassured him. Meg cared for the human now because Cas did and if anything happened to him, Dean would be safe. 

A yawn interrupted his thoughts and he turned to Dean, “You should sleep. You’re still not fully healed.” 

“What time is it?” 

Cas replied without thinking, “Not yet dawn.” 

“Egh, okay, I’m hitting the hay.” He replied and then paused, seemingly unsure. 

“Would you like me to come with you?” Cas asked. 

The nod was short and sharp as if the human didn’t want to admit it. 

“I’ll be there soon Dean, I have to take care of a few things.” 

“Okay. Sure.” 

Cas saw him shake off the need for an angel he’d only met days ago, recompose himself and walk to his room. 

“You are in way over your head my friend.” 

Meg’s words pulled him back to her. Watching Dean walk away took his entire thought process, that was dangerous.

“I’m fine.”

The frown which flowed over her delicate face was suddenly marred by a shit-eating grin, “No dude, you’re done for. I’m going to go outside and dig your grave right now.”

“If I died you would be burying my vessel, not me.”

Meg rolled her eyes, “I know that dumb ass.”

Cas smiled, knowing that she knew. It made him happy that his sudden foray into human emotion hadn’t affected their friendship. 

“So you’re going to try and do this without taking the human right?”

“Dean and yes, I am aware of his need to save the others but I can’t risk him.” 

“Yup. Love makes you a chump, that’s why you won't find me loving anyone.”

Cas raised his eyebrow at the word love, was it love? Something unnatural was definitely at play but their connection couldn’t be denied. 

“Don’t think too hard feathers. We’ll figure it out.” Meg said as she punched his arm lightly. He frowned and watched her move to the liqueur cabinet and pour whisky into a crystal glass. 

“So, you have a plan?” She asked slumping into a hard-backed chair. 

Frowning, Cas moved to sit across from her, “It’s more of a vague idea than a plan.” 

“We’re winging it then huh?” she said wincing as she swallowed the amber liquid. “This is gross.” 

Cas couldn’t help but smile as she threw back the rest of the drink. A memory rose, the one of every time she tried something new at the bar and quickly reverted to her regular whiskey. 

Meg stared at him, “Okay Cas, tell me what I need to know about this situation. It’s time to spill my friend, I need to know what you know.” 

Taking a deep breath he didn’t need, Cas hunched forward and rested his hands on his knees. 

“After the fall, you know what it was like. Chaos. Demons, Witches, Angels and humans all fighting for supremacy but eventually the humans took sides. ”

“Right, I know that-”

“In the beginning, the humans were little more than apes, so we took it upon ourselves to organise and use them.”

Meg frowned, “Yeah, we did the same. What am I missing?”

Cas sighed, “I hated it. I’d always had a natural empathy for them and they became little more than slaves. We were supposed to be better than that Meg, God would have wanted us to be better than that.”

“You mean us? He would have wanted you to be better than the demons?”

Nodding, Cas fell back into the memory as he spoke. 

“It was the day I left, only a few months before I met you. The fighting had been slowing down because of the talks and the losses your side was taking. So I tried to talk to them again. I got in yet another argument with Anna about how we treated the humans. There was no reason to use them any more, the Demons were outnumbered and victory was imminent. We couldn’t reach a compromise because she wanted to be sure we should win and would keep them until she was sure. As the fighting wined, my brethren became more and more vicious with the humans. They were treating them as pets to be played with. I couldn’t stomach it so I challenged them. Anna stepped in knowing they would lose against me. She knew it would escalate and result in deaths that we couldn't afford. She was my best friend but on this, we fought. To show weakness would have been her end and if there is one thing angels can't abide its weakness. It took everything I had not to kill her, I didn’t want to kill her but I was always stronger.”

Meg frowned, “So you showed her mercy? You stopped.” 

Cas nodded and continued, “ I made her promise to free the humans we had, which she did, in exchange for her life. They had started Angels Inc as a concept. I knew they were going to do bad things, they always do bad things but I ran. I didn’t want to be a part of it. I could have stopped them… I should have tried. Instead, I demanded a piece of any profit they made from future endeavours. Simply to ease my own conscience, just so I could give it away. Pathetic, I know. If I go there she’ll know why. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re looking for me, they’ll know I’ll try to stop them. I have to try to stop them.” 

“WE. We’ll stop them. You’re not alone feathers.” 

Cas frowned, “You don’t like humans Meg.” 

“Dean said it, they’re half breeds. Pretty sure there will be more than one part demon in that mix. I have no love for anyone but I won't let Angels fuck with something that's part blood. Anyway, you wouldn’t last two minutes without me.” 

“Okay.” He sighed, a smile playing on his lips, “We should go and check out the security, I haven’t been there in a long time.” 

She stood, “Sure, let's go.”

Cas glanced over his shoulder to the room in which Dean slept, they’d be back soon, he would never know. Then they could make a plan and before morning. They’d have rescued the others or at least have a better idea of what was going on. Dean would be here, safe. Cas still wasn’t sure why that was important. Why Dean was so important to him but the overwhelming need to keep that human safe was all consuming. 

“Cas? You coming?” Meg’s voice called from the stairs.

“Yeah.” He straightened his trench coat and followed her out into the early morning air. It was cool, the sky was clear and full of fluffy clouds, a lovely day. Cas touched Meg’s shoulder, engaged his wings and screamed. 

“Cas!” Meg yelled as he fell to his knees on the dirt outside the bunker.

The pain was unbearable, for a being who rarely felt pain it was almost indescribable. Agony filled him as if parts were being torn from his soul. 

“What's wrong?” His friend asked again but he couldn’t find the words and then it hit him, oh no.

“Dean, go check on Dean.” The words were out in a hiss of air as he continued to twitch. “Meg. Go!”

She did, every second felt like a thousand years as Cas sat there unable to move. After an eternity she appeared with a writhing Dean in her arms. The closer she moved him the easier the pain became until they were side by side on the ground panting. The human was near unconscious until Cas laid his hand on Dean’s chest, the pain waned and he gasped.

“Cas… what happened?” he whispered as if breath was hard to come by. 

“Yeah, my thoughts exactly,” Meg growled. The Demon was never happy being left in the dark. The pain ebbed and finally Cas could move, he glanced up at his friend and then down to Dean trying to figure it out. 

“I think we’re connected somehow. Something my kin did while you were in their possession. Maybe it’s responsible for the way we feel as well?” 

Dean shuffled to kneeling with his head resting on Cas’ shoulder. It seemed too much effort for the half breed to lift it. 

“Are you alright?” Cas asked and Dean nodded. Good, now they needed to get back inside. It was a struggle but Meg supported them both, yey for Demon strength. Once inside Dean made coffee and they all drank in silence. Cas was mulling over the possibilities and the only one he could come to was horrible, a violation. So he chose to ignore it. Unfortunately, he had a very intuitive best friend. 

“Cas, what was that?” Meg asked because she knew he knew something. 

“I-”

Scowling she stood, “And don’t you dare say you don’t know. I know you know something.” 

Dean watched them while he sipped his coffee, nursing the drink as if it was the only solid thing in the world. 

He sighed, a most unnecessary sigh and met her gaze, “I think… I think they used my grace to make Dean into whatever he is.”

“Well fuck.” She replied and sat hard into her chair. 

“Fuck indeed.” 

“Wait, so I’m part of you?” Dean’s voice, full of both wonder and annoyance bounced around the room.

Cas nodded, “I don’t know how they got my grace… unless… Anna saved it. Damn her.” 

“You gave them your grace?” Meg hissed. Their grace was their power, their lifeblood. Even Meg understood what a violation it was for someone to use it without the owner's permission. 

“It was back during the war Meg, we were all asked to save a little every day so that we could use it in the event it was required.” 

“Like a backup plan?” Dean asked

“More like a nuclear bomb,” Meg growled. 

Dean’s eyes went wide, “Seriously?”

“Yes human, Seriously.” 

The Demon glared at Cas, her eyes full of annoyance at this situation and of the unknown which she detested. 

“Meg, we need to go there more than ever,” Cas said. 

“How Cas?” She replied, “How? We can’t take him. As far as that little display outside demonstrated, you’re basically joined at the what? Soul?”

They mulled it over, unsure how to proceed until it hit Cas like a boulder. 

“I have an idea.”

“But?” Meg replied.

“You’re not going to like it.”

She sneered playfully, “When do I ever? Spill.”

“Do you still have Charlie’s number?”

The playful side left her, “No Castiel.”

Dean needs a disguise, something that will fool them.” He used his calm voice, “Please Meg? We don’t have any other choice.” 

It must have been a comical sight for Dean to watch as they fought over this. Finally, she relented. 

“Fine! I’ll call but I don’t know if we can trust her Cas.” She glanced at the ceiling, “I trusted her t find you but this, this is different.” 

Cas sighed, “I know but it is a risk we’ll have to take.” 

Sitting there watching Meg dial made him tense. He didn’t get tense before, so he was guessing at the emotions coursing through his veins. Dean leaned in, his solid weight against Cas' shoulder released some of the tension. Cas had no idea how the next few days would play out but he knew one thing. That whatever his siblings were doing to the humans had to stop and it had to be him who stopped them.


	4. DEAN: What is in a dream?

Falling asleep wasn’t an issue, his body, still healing from the trauma that it had suffered was eager to sleep. Exhaustion bit at his heels and dragged him under like a tide. No, falling asleep was easy. The dreams, however, they were a battlefield, a war which raged within his mind. Dean’s eyes drifted closed and then the memories came. The past consumed him without mercy.

Sam sat on a fallen tree swinging his long legs back and forth. Rain fell from the makeshift shelter they had created from branches. A thunderous midday sky growled at them and Dean grimaced, why couldn’t they have started this on a warm summer day?  
Reconnaissance, their Mom had decided it was time for them to learn by doing. They were out on their own for the first time. The resistance base was located in the deep dark wilderness of the Midwest where nothing but the animals and locals roamed. Angels had no business here, nor Demons, there was nothing but farmland for hundreds of miles. They were safe out here, safe to live and let their guard down a little. Which was why Dean and Sam had been allowed to wander miles away from home to scout the surroundings. There was a safe house not far from here. If anything went wrong then they could run there and the warding would keep them safe. The likelihood of anything happening though was slim to none. Dean already regretted bringing Sam. 

“Deeeeeaaaaan?” 

Dean sighed at his brothers whining, “Yes Sam?” 

“Can we go yet? I’m so bored I think I might die.” 

“You will if I murder you,” Dean whispered under his breath. 

“What was that?” 

Glancing over his shoulder he replied with a wry smile, “Nothing. You begged Mom to let you go out scouting and now you’re bored?”

“I thought it would be more… I dunno… exciting.” Sam moaned as he scratched moss from the tree with the toe of his boot. They had been sitting in the same spot for over an hour, watching the road in and out of their section. It was silent which was good for the hidden civilization that they called home. Not good for a teenager looking for some excitement. Though no excitement was a very good thing, this needed to go smoothly. Their Mom was the leader and they needed to make a good impression.

When their ancestors had been released from Angel slavery they had decided to hide. They had not been trusting of a new regime in which humans were equals. Having seen the worst of the Angels, their faction decided to play it safe and remain unseen. Dean knew their people were being hunted. They had been taught that from the moment they were old enough to understand. Being around the Angels for long periods had made certain bloodlines more accepting of hybridisation. When their captors discovered this, the elders knew they had made the right choice because that's when the persecution began. Over the years they had been joined by other non-humans and hybrids. The doors had opened out of necessity rather than want. Bloodlines became stale after a few generations and it was important to mix things up, or that’s what his Mom said. A chill ran down Dean’s spine, the cool air pushed at his jacket and made him wish for home. Yeah, he’d wanted this responsibility but he agreed with Sam, it was a little boring and cold. 

“We only have to stay here for a bit longer, just chill okay.” He replied to his brother.

A dramatic sigh flowed over his shoulder in response, “Fine.” 

Rolling his eyes, Dean stood and stretched. The leather of his worn brown jacket creaked as the damp of the rain created friction in the creases. 

“I’m gonna take a leak.” He said throwing the binoculars to Sam, “Just keep watch and don’t move.”

Sam’s eyes lit up at the idea of being in charge and then instantly disappointed at being told to stay. “I’m not a little kid Dean.” He replied, then ran his hand through his already too long hair. 

Dean waved dismissively as he walked away, next time he was leaving Sam at home. 

The tree they used as a bathroom wasn’t far and he could still see their camouflaged shelter. The field was surrounded on three sides by more fields. In summer it was beautiful but right now it was a dull brown soggy mess. The side they camped on was forest and the road cut through the centre to add a little excitement to the endlessness of the fields. It was nice out here usually and unlike most of his peers, Dean had never longed for the excitement of the city. There were too many people in the city, too many unknown variables. Lost in his thoughts, Dean missed the flash of dark green. It moved faster than human from their safe place into the dead foliage of the open field. 

“Ah!” 

Sam’s cry had his feet moving instantly. “Son of a bitch,” Dean cursed under his breath, "Sam!"

Rounding the corner he stopped, hard. What he saw had his boots slamming to a halt so fast it jarred his spine and near had him ass first in the mud. Sam lay sprawled on the floor, unconscious and bleeding. Though it didn’t look serious Dean’s heart pounded in his chest. He wanted to move but his feet stuck to the damp soil with terror. A blur of two tall men fighting with swords had him trembling. Panic raged in his chest as he glanced from his brother to the fight. What could he do... they were... they were Angels. He knew by their sheer speed they were nothing human. What could he possibly do against them?

“You have no right to stop me Castiel!” The stocky brunette yelled at his opponent as he gained ground. They were moving further away from Sam’s prone form so Dean took the opportunity and ran for him. Metal clanged against metal, the damp air smelt charged with tension as if a spark would set it off any moment. 

The one named Castiel frowned and replied, “You are wanted by the human police Uriel. Anna won’t take you in, she doesn’t feel it is important enough to expend resources on. For this, I will bend our agreement of non-interference. Human children are off limits! Your desires are abhorrent and as they cannot contain you, I will resolve their issue for them.” 

Dean took a moment to admire the Angel who against everything he had been taught was fighting for them. To protect them. He wasn’t sure what had happened, maybe Sam had been caught in the fighting? Castiel was facing him as they battled on. Blue eyes blazed like cold fire and Dean was in awe, he had never seen anything so beautiful. 

Uriel screamed as a silver blade pierced his chest, it snapped Dean out of his trance. He hadn’t seen either Angel gain the upper hand on the other but it must have happened. A bright light was blinding for a second but then it vanished. As Dean shook Sam’s chest, Uriel fell to the ground in a lifeless heap. His body trembled, both from the adrenaline and fear but also from the rain dripping cold winter water down his spine. 

The Angel, Castiel, took steps towards him and Dean pulled his knife from his jacket. 

“I won't harm you,” he said moving with caution, “Let me heal him, please, it is the least I can do.”

Dean froze, he’d only ever seen Angels in books and they were always vicious looking. In the stories, they were described as shadows, there one moment and gone the next. The almost never spoke to their human prey. Dean may have been the only one in the history of his people that had spoken to an Angel and he had no idea what to do. 

“You hurt him…” he whispered, one hand stroking Sam wild and bloody hair. 

Castiel frowned, “No, Uriel tried to take him. The boy got hurt fighting back. I intervened.”

Dean could feel Sam’s breathing becoming laboured under his hands. Terror consumed him as the life left his brother and he made what might be considered a reckless decision. 

“Heal him. I think… he’s… please” 

Moving cautiously, Castiel knelt and placed two fingers on the teenager's forehead. A second later Sam gasped, his eyes going wide as new life filled him. Dean looked up to thank the Angel, it was out of habit more than want but before he could Castiel's fingers pressed against his skin.

“I’m sorry, you cannot remember,” Castiel whispered.

Dean blinked and there was nothing. Where he could have sworn someone had been was only empty space and two knee prints in the mud.

The dream changed and Dean was in the city with Sam at his back. They were older now, it was more recent. Cars rushed by and it made the bothers nervous. 

“Dean, can we hurry? I hate the city, it smells weird.” Sam hissed. 

The feeling was mutual, the enemy was everywhere and it made him twitchy. At one time The City was all Sam would talk about but something had changed. That day in the field, he wasn’t sure what, the memory was foggy but Sam had changed that day. Now, when they did a city-run Sam did nothing but complain the whole time. It was an annoyance but some things they could only get from the city proper. Deep winter had set in and the cold crept into their bones. What he wouldn't give for the cabin and an open fire he mused as his boots crunched on the ice-covered sidewalk. 

They broke into the pharmacy like pros, grabbed what they needed then ran. That’s when it happened, a crowd of demons leaving a bar came around the corner and ran straight into them. 

“Look what we have here boys. Dirty little humans taking what isn’t theirs.” A broad, mean looking guy spat, his black eyes focused on their spoils.

Dean pilled all his stolen goods onto Sam, “Go Sammy. Now.”

“No Dean!” he growled, stubborn as ever. 

“Sam, go, now. They need those meds. I’ll follow you. Just go!” 

For a moment Sam was torn but then he ran, knowing the greater good was at stake. Dean caused a distraction and thankfully the police turned up before he could be beaten too much into a pulp. 

The cell at the precinct was dark and dirty.

“Arm.” A short, female officer grunted at him. 

Frowning, Dean asked, “Why?”

“Standard procedure, make sure you’re not diseased.” She grinned menacingly, ”Either offer your arm or I’ll take it by force and it hurts more that way. It’s up to you.”

Considering his options Dean conceded even while knowing it was a bad idea. Hopefully, he could get out before they realised who and what he was. Dizziness swamped his vision and he collapsed in a heap as the woman reached for his arm. 

“Hey, no faking okay! I don’t have time to take you to-”

Her scathing remark was cut short as Dean threw up his cheeseburger and fries all over the cell floor. He didn’t think he’d been badly hurt but now pain swam around his ribs. Damn, he’d been dying for that cheeseburger too, what a waste.

As he lifted the blood-stained shirt the police officer hissed, “We need a medic!” 

There was chatter beyond the bars. Darkness flicked at the edges of his vision while the cold of the concrete floor seeped into his knees. It grounded him but only for a second and then nothing. 

Dean was warm and comfortable as consciousness pushed him up from the depths. Voices disturbed his rest, someone wasn’t happy. 

“Cas, we have patients who are more important than a criminal!” A young woman growled from behind the disposable curtain which separated Dean from them. He still felt awful and everything seemed far away. 

“I understand Jo but I need to do this.” Regret and determination filled the man's tone.

Dean writhed as the pain became worse once more. The curtain moved almost soundlessly but he heard it. Dean couldn’t open his eyes to see the person who insisted on being his saviour, it bothered him. The voice was eerily familiar though yet Dean didn’t know anyone in the city and so dismissed it. Cool fingers touched his brow and darkness claimed him once more. 

The dream changed again.

The room was grey. Not the grey of rain clouds or a horned African beast, no, it was a dirty grey. A depressing and oppressive shade that drained all happiness from the world. Panic flushed through his chest but with distance. He knew somewhere in his mind that this was a memory, harmless. Yeah sure. His cage, if it could really be called that, was a small space separated by glass walls. It had taken a long time to get used to living like a fly in a jar. Of having no privacy and made to wear the same grey as the walls. It sucked the life from the soul all that grey. The sterile space smelt of cleaners and it was so strong he never got used to it. Having to eat the rabbit food they gave him… that was one of the worst things, he’d kill for something greasy. If he ever got out of here, he was hitting a burger joint as fast as he could. The thought made him smile for a second.

The world had a mist around it, an air of dreamscape. It was there until the creek of a door focused the scene. His mind flicked back to the hospital visit, that had been his undoing. They had taken blood, the blood had been screened and within hours the Angels had found him and brought him here. 

“Good morning Mr Winchester.” The words were sharp, cold. It was a discourse of habit. A mask of civility cultivated for the worlds external pleasantries. They were not pleasant, in actuality, Dean would never describe this Angel as anything but evil. 

Naomi tinkered with her equipment as Dean stayed silent. He never replied nor engaged in any way that he didn’t have to. 

“Now Dean, today I’m going to test something new. I had to get special permission for this so you have to behave, I may not get a second try at it.” 

Again he didn’t respond but as she approached with a vile full of glowing ethereal grace he started to shake. A fine tremble which made him feel pathetic and weak. He wasn’t pathetic nor weak, he’d survived for… a long time in here, he wasn’t sure how long. Whatever they did to him affected his memory or maybe they did that? He wasn’t sure but he could never get a grip on time and time was something the Angels had in abundance. All Dean’s escape attempts had resulted in failure, pain and failure. A shudder fell through him at the torture, yes, that he could recall in excruciating detail. The injections themselves were a form of torture, it hurt every time his body rejected the lifeblood of his captors. 

As she approached with the vile, Dean backed away. His ass hitting the wall, the only concrete wall in the room. There was no use in fighting, he knew that but he always lashed out and ended up on the floor, face down with a needle in his neck. Once the plunger dispensed he would become rigid, flail and then the pain would begin. Time would pass and when he woke it would feel as though he’d been through a wood chipper. This time though something new happened. The white, almost silver substance entered his veins in a rush of endorphins. A high like nothing he’d ever felt coursed through his veins and with it a flash of memories, not his but someone else's. A dark-haired man with beautiful blue eyes swamped his mind. A name wasn’t forthcoming but that didn’t matter because Dean knew him. He hadn’t before the injection, had he? but he knew this man, no, he was an Angel. The memories let him know the Angel better than he did himself. Before he could get a grip on the memories they were taken by his mind and locked away to protect him from being overwhelmed. Then the pain began, it was different this time, almost as if he was being remade from the inside. The trembling became a full-on seizure as his atoms tore apart and integrated the essence of a celestial being. Suddenly the knowledge was there, he could escape. It wasn’t a conscious thought, no, he was barely alive but his mind knew what to do with the information.

“Hold him!” Naomi’s voice screamed as their hands gripped his arms and legs past the point of bruising. Sheer agony was all he could focus on, that and breathing. Then past the point of breaking. His bones snapped under the pressure of the assault, his soul started to waver, splinter. The part that was now Angel reached for the rest of its soul. Castiel… 

“He’s slipping.” She yelled, “He’s trying to-”

Silence and everything became calm until he slammed into the sidewalk. Pain, so much pain it almost pulled him under. Death was knocking at his mind trying to drag him away from the agony and he nearly let it but the light wouldn't let him. 

‘Find him.’ It wasn’t a voice but a pull, as if his soul knew where to go. He wasn’t sure how he did it and everything hurt but he moved. The wall was his support as he stood on broken legs, then one foot in front of another for what felt like an eternity. Finally, Dean’s gaze flitted over a dark purple sign. ‘Darkness Rises’ he read before quickly falling into a heap. Arms caught him, such strong arms held him as he gazed up into the beautiful blue eyes of his memories. Dean knew at once that he could trust this man, this Angel. If he had been in his right mind it would have horrified him but right now he only wanted one thing. The Angel spoke to a Demon and as he drifted he caught most of what was said.

“No… no hospital’s…” he heaved with a voice like sandpaper, “Home… take me… home…”

A cool breeze found his skin and pulled him from the past back to the present. 

“Dean?” Cas whispered from the dark side of the room.

There was a lamp, Dean lent over and pressed the switch with shaky fingers.

“Cas… I… remember.”

**Author Note**

Thank you for your patience, this chapter was squirmy, reluctant to come out. You know how Dean can be. I hope you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> Because Sarah (again) tagged my ass she gets kudos for the concept. Stop it, I have to adult! 
> 
> THANK YOU FOR READING.  
> I LOVE YOU ALL! Thank you for your endless support and comments (and grammar/spelling corrections/continuity amendments) while I've been going through my seemingly endless trauma recently. I'm in a much better place and my muse has returned, it's slow going but I'm trying to get on my WIP's. I hope you enjoy x


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